Thursday, June 2, 2011

Summer Seasonings

Doom commands you to lookee here, little monsters. Summer's baking rays speed toward us from Mother Sol, taking eight minutes to reach earth (Doom Fact! Collect them all, curs!). With the assistance of Doom's SunDimmer Skin Lotion, all of Latveria may enjoy hours in the sunshine, gobbling Vitamin D and grilled vittles in the generous recreation time allotted by Emperor Doom. Doom Himself obviously needs no sun exposure as with the rest of you scrawny mortals. Doom exploits science to provide nutrients from the very air and absorbs them via his perfect and dread armor.

But if you, like Latveria's grateful populace, require time with your grills and your outdoor cookery, Doom has a boon to grant. Two, because Doom is good and kind. Doom has recently improvised seasonings based on concoctions found within the Secret Gypsy Momma Cookbook, improved, no doubt, in an effortless manner by Doom's daunting intellect.

Steak Seasoning
A trifle, but delicious. Enjoy the latitude Doom graciously provides in this ratio:
30 percent dried basil
30 percent dried savory
30 percent dried oregano
10 percent ground black pepper

Doom commands you to combine and sprinkle upon your sundry meat products before applying heat.

Fajita Seasonings
Equal portions of :
Chili powder
Cayenne pepper
Onion powder
Garlic powder
Italian seasoning
pinches of crushed red pepper (Doom warns you to go easy here)

Doom commands you to mix and sprinkle upon your sundry meat products before applying heat.

Now begone.

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